“NOT JUST FOR THE RICH AND FAMOUS…”
Chances are, you if you are reading this, you are NOT a celebrity and you are probably not rich like a celebrity. You probably don’t have a personal chef to slave over the stove and make you low-calorie yet delicious meals. You probably don’t have a famous personal trainer to whip you into shape before a big event. You certainly don’t have a Pool Boy (or even a pool) or a Nanny to take care of your children for you. You probably don’t have a Maid to clean your home or a Gardner to trim your hedges (well, some of you might). Anyways…the point I’m trying to make is what if I were to tell you that CAN feel like a celebrity and have your very own Beauty Lounge in the privacy of your own home AND at a fraction of the cost!
Let’s be honest, this is Victoria…It’s expensive to live here – dare I say “Island Tax”? To top it off, most of us are busy. We work full-time, have “Crawls” to drive through every day. We have families and responsibilities to attend to. When do we even have time to even paint our own nails? And once in a blue moon (have you actually ever actually seen one?) when we do have time to “pamper” ourselves we aim to do it on a Sunday (when parking downtown is free). If Sundays don’t work with our busy schedule, we bite our tongue as we drive around the block to try and get a close enough parking spot to where we need to be. We then mumble under our breaths when we can’t find one and grudgingly park in an obscenely overpriced parkade. Sure, we may only walk 3 blocks, but we are 15 minutes late and we are greeted at the desk by a baby-voiced girl half our age with a “Hi Luv” (don’t you hate that). This girl then brings you to your so-called “expert” who only knows your name because she peeked at the appointment book just moments before you arrived. As she sits you down, she reminds you that you are 15 minutes late and that she has a client right after you. Sure you probably have great looking nails when your all done but you probably paid a pretty penny for it (not including the tax and tip and the parking). At the end of it all, did you ask yourself this, “Did Ireally get spoiled?” or “Did I get the “Red Carpet Treatment?”…Probably not.
And for those of you who doth protest (or won’t simply even bother) going to a salon to get a manicure, you pull out your $15 nail polish from the bottom of your drawer and you even remember your Base Coat and Top Coat! You then gather enough courage and do it yourself (rather than call me and avoid what will be a horrible experience and such a waste of time). First you make sure to do ALL of the chores ahead of time. You then take off your makeup, brush your teeth and get into your PJ’s. You send the kids to bed, husband to his cave, dog to the garage….It really is a big ordeal to prepare for this “Nail Painting” event. You go through all the preparation just to make sure that there is absolutely NOTHING that needs to be done (because we all know, once you paint your nails, you are done for the night). Once you are ready to go you painstakingly master (in poor light) what you think is a stunning manicure (when actually it’s not – sorry, but its true). It took you over 30 minutes (not including all the prep work). And you then feel disappointed not 20 minutes later when your husband smudges it! Of course, this is what we all tell ourselves when really it was US who wasn’t paying attention when we unconsciously brushed the hair from off our face. So, after adding another coat on top of the smudge you (or your husband) just made, you blow on them like candles on a cake and wave your hands in the air like Beyoncé’s “Single Ladies” for five minutes straight. Then you ask your husband to tuck you into bed where you lay like stupid-looking Mummy with your arms over the comforter and say to your man, “Sorry Honey. No nookie tonight.” You hope to fall asleep dreaming of all the compliments you will get at work on your pretty nails only soon to find out when you wake up in the middle of the night to go pee, that you see a bloody CHIP on your thumb! How on earth?
Sorry about all that…totally got off topic there. Just sharing one of the many stories I’ve heard. Where was I? Oh yes, I was about to speak for the majority of us. Say, wouldn’t it be nice to be treated like a celebrity and not go through all that? Wouldn’t you love to get the “Red Carpet Treatment” without having to pay an arm and a leg for it or do a crappy job yourself? Of course you would! Wouldn’t it be nice to stay at home, and have the salon staff come to you and paint your nails with polish that dries in seconds and lasts for 2 weeks? What about getting a mess-free spray tan in your own living room?
Don’t even get me started on the experience you will have with a spray tan in a salon. There is nothing worse than getting undressed in a cold room and having your wobbly bits sprayed (either by a machine or by a girl 20 years younger than you who calls you “Luv” or “Hun”). You are instructed to get back into your clothes and shoes, smudging the tan you just paid $50 bucks, later to discover you have tanned sock lines. The worst of the worst is you come out of the salon looking like you were sprayed with watery dirt (no one tells you that). And looking like a sticky, hot mess with no makeup on, you must then embarrassingly walk out in public to your car parked 5 blocks away (crap, another $5 bucks) hoping no one will notice you. Then all of a sudden walking towards you is your hot ex-boyfriend walking hand in hand with his hot new girlfriend (crap!) – And you are forced to make a detour so he won’t see you.
But…if you really do want me to tell you what it would be like to get a spray tan at a salon, rather than the comfort of your own home, I WILL. If I do, I promise I will also tell you how when you hire me as your personal spray tan technician, you’ll soon discover that I’m in and out of your home in less than 30 minutes. And once I leave all you have to do is lay a towel down on your couch, turn on the tube and watch Ellen while all your wobbly bits hang out to dry…And don’t worry about me seeing your wobbly bits…I don’t even really look at them…I glaze over them. I’ve seen tonnes of ta-ta’s and “Sorry, I’m in-between waxes” and I forget them all!
Imagine the money that you will save just in parking alone if you hire Privé Beauty Lounge. Imagine the time you will save in NOT driving downtown to a spa or salon. Imagine the peace of mind you will have knowing you are an ears shot away from your kids or husband (if they heaven forbid need you while your soaking your feet in a deliciously warm tub of water and salts, while you sip your hot tea and gab with your best friend at your side on your comfy couch, in your comfy sweats).
I want you to look and feel like a million bucks, without spending a million bucks. I want you to tell all your friends or better yet, invite them over and share your newfound pleasure of Privé Beauty Lounge. I want you to help me set the new trend of not conforming to the masses. Sure, we may all carry Marc Jacobs bags, wear Wunder Unders and order Americano’s but we all nearly don’t pamper ourselves enough in luxury. Stop paying the City of Victoria an obscene amount of money for a parking spot and take part of a new trend by inviting me (Privé Beauty Lounge) into your home. Oh and to top it off, I work around YOUR schedule (within reason of course – I have a life too). I have made it a mission that Privé Beauty Lounge will not be like a traditional salon. It’s not just for the rich and famous. Privé Beauty Lounge does not close at 6pm or on Sundays like most. If you want me to come after dinner, I will! Most of my clients are working moms and they love that I do evening appointments. They even love me more because I save them money when they bring a friend!
If you are ever worried about having a stranger (meaning me) come into your home, DON’T. I am a professional. I am clean and very polite. I wash my hands, recycle AND I say “Please” and “Thank you”. I taught children for many years (so you know I’ll be comfortable with your kids) and I take care of my 92 year old Grandmother. I have both a cat and man whom I adore with kisses and I have one whole closet devoted to fancy shoes (that saying, if you like fashion, we’ll be the best of friends and have lots to talk about!)
Thanks for taking the time out of your busy day to read this rambling. I really hope we get to meet and I look forward to hearing from you very soon. Who knows…perhaps we will become friends – BTW, friends get discounts!
I wish you all the best and hope you have a pretty day.
(that’s what my friends call me)